When I was in eighth (or was it ninth?) class, one of our teachers asked in the class, what do you want to become in your life? People said a lot of things. When my turn came up, I stood up and said, “Mein software engineer banana chahta hu” (I want to become a software engineer). It was not that I was genuinely interested in Computers. When I look back now, I realize that it was my cousins who affected my choice (in an indirect way), and their achievements fascinated me to aim at this particular career choice.
My whole life for the last seven years was revolving around this one dream(!) of getting a job in an MNC. I got my chance when I got placed in Cisco last Monsoon. I was super excited about joining Cisco since then. Perhaps because of the MacBook on which I am typing this article right now 😄 and partly because of the monotonicity of the NIT-C environment. I wanted to break out of the comfort zone that I had built there around myself in NIT-C. Changing place seemed the only viable option.
I have been doing a self-introspection for the last four to five months. My blog posts from the previous few months reflect some hints about my introspections. I have mentioned my observations here and there in a few of my blog posts. I discovered some unique aspects of my personality. On the other hand, I found out some traits which are pretty weird (in my opinion :) ). I am not going to publish all of my findings, but one thing became apparent, my social anxiety requires my immediate attention.
It is quite difficult to change some aspects of our personality; usually those we are born with. But most of the qualities that define someone keeps changing. Life experiences play an essential role in determining a person’s character. Success and failure define a person. I firmly believe that no person ever remains the same. People continuously go through phases of realizations and the ups and downs in the career, academics, broken trusts, dampening creativity, growing age, success, glory, hatred, and betrayals. People become what they are because of the world around them. These realizations come from experiences and experiences that come from bad experiences.
I learned this the hard way!
So, I decided, I will not commit those similar set of mistakes again. I will make new mistakes 😜. I realized that there exists a world outside computers and tech. I need to go and talk to people. If not random strangers, I should talk to my friends, take part in various activities, play some sport, focus on my fitness and mental health, and go on trips. And of course, perform well in work and maintain a good work-life balance if it is not a myth.
I cannot change the past now. It is only the future that is yet in my power. I am eager to see how my current actions are going to affect my future.
At last, let me finish this article by quoting Winston Churchill (Although I am not a big fan of him, this quote is worth sharing).
If we open a quarrel between past and present, we shall find that we have lost the future.